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Thread: Love. Does it even exist?

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    Default Love. Does it even exist?

    I have the worst time in relationships. It seems everyone I date has or wants to disrespect my parents. I've been single now for a three years.
    I'm beginning to think that some people are meant to have a significant other while some are not. I feel like I'm going to never find someone even though I want to find love.

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Everyone feels like that, especially before they fall in love.

    You want to find someone with common interests and personality traits, right? You like writing, right? Here's an idea:

    1. Rent a post office box.
    2. Sign up with a dating service.
    3. Tell anyone who wants to communicate with you that they need to write a letter to your p.o. box, and only respond to mailed correspondence.

    That's kind of an intriguing challenge for the other person. They have to make some extra investment to take the next step, and that makes you more important in their mind. It lets you get to know each other better before you meet. And it might help you find someone who's literate and likes to write.

    Good luck, and remember that almost every other single person feels the same way you do.

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    Senior Member SIR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Maybe is your family?

    http://www.chilloutpoint.com/feature...otographs.html

    Don't worry, I have a [very] weird family too!


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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    If it's meant to be it will happen but don't force it if there can't be peace with in your home.

    I was lucky... I saw her and she became the only girl I ever wanted and after pursuing her for two years she gave me a chance. Now we have been married 9 years with four kids.

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by MFP View Post
    Everyone feels like that, especially before they fall in love.

    You want to find someone with common interests and personality traits, right? You like writing, right? Here's an idea:

    1. Rent a post office box.
    2. Sign up with a dating service.
    3. Tell anyone who wants to communicate with you that they need to write a letter to your p.o. box, and only respond to mailed correspondence.

    That's kind of an intriguing challenge for the other person. They have to make some extra investment to take the next step, and that makes you more important in their mind. It lets you get to know each other better before you meet. And it might help you find someone who's literate and likes to write.

    Good luck, and remember that almost every other single person feels the same way you do.
    And/or try advertising in our Compenionship group .

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    Senior Member Lady Onogaro's Avatar
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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    I didn't meet my husband until I was 43. I'd pretty much given up on the idea of getting married, but I kept running into this guy who was a friend of some of the graduate students in my department. He was in a different department (computer science). We would all sit around and talk in the Writing Center. At any rate, one day, I ran into him in the hall of my building, and we stood and talked for maybe 45 minutes. Finally, I had to leave, and he said, "I hope you don't mind me holding you up like this. I always enjoy our conversations so much." I thought to myself "hmmm." At lunch that day, I related the experience to my friend, then I said, "You know, I'm going to call that guy and ask him to go for coffee." She said, "I could never call a guy and ask him out." I said, "Well, it can't be any harder for us than it is for them." So I called and left a message in his department. He called me back later that day, and instead of coffee, we decided on dinner. Before our scheduled dinner, he came by to visit me three or four times. It wasn't long before we were a couple. Oh, and he was 37, had never been married, and, like me, had decided to give up his job to go back to school for a master's degree.

    We've been married 16 years now. The other day, he pulled out the original pink message slip which had my name and number on it. He's kept it since 1997. Isn't that romantic?

    Oh, and my parents and siblings and niece have loved him from the get go.

    I won't say it's always been peaches and cream, but what's true is that I want what is best for him, and he wants what is best for me. We each try to do good things for each other. We try not to hurt each other.
    Last edited by Lady Onogaro; October 4th, 2017 at 06:46 PM.
    Lady Onogaro

    "Be yourself--everybody else is already taken." --Oscar Wilde

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    Cool Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by Spideysgirl View Post
    It seems everyone I date has or wants to disrespect my parents.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lady Onogaro View Post
    my parents and siblings and niece have loved him from the get go.
    With hindsight, something which i should've valued more from one particular friend, and one who i should've treated as more than a friend but sadly never did, was the fact that she was someone i knew i could rely on to challenge my family when necessary (fair to say many of my friends could be generally challenging, a downside to enjoying a mix of friendship groups).

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Perhaps it exists for some people, but not for me. Someone once told me that they worshipped the ground I walked on, I think that this was because I changed their life so fundamentally, for me they were just a close and special friend, although I wept uncontrollably for a very long time when they left me, 15 years after we met.

    I dreamt last night that we married, I was devastated to wake this morning, the dream being over.

    Perhaps love existed for me, I just didn't know it.

    And doubt that I will again.

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    You are not alone.

    It was the best of love; it was the worst of love. It was the WTF of love (usually).

    No matter what. Always love yourself. Or, at least, like yourself. And whether or not anyone ever recognizes you (and it's mutual)... keep an open mind. You never know.

    And there are no guarantees.

    Some people find their "soul-mates." Most people just keep on keeping on. (But what do I know? Don't listen to me. I'm not an expert.) (I'm just keeping on keeping on. Ya know.) (Maybe it's not "MOST" people. I don't have the statistics. But there are more than seven billion persons on earth. You telling me that MOST of them are "successfully" in love?) (It is what it is.) (Try not to harden your heart, no matter what.)


    Edit: WHAT?! The Internet should have a breathalyzer* before posting "wisdom." (Although I do still like "it was the WTF of love." Hah.) I should have deleted that last paragraph at least.


    *Poland. Wódka. Party! Then, inexplicably, the Internet. Oh, Internet, you can be so pernicious.
    Last edited by ethernautrix; October 8th, 2017 at 02:24 PM.
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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    I was talking to a friend about this subject, she sees a great deal of the more unusual side of human life and meets many men during her working day as a specialist make up artist.

    I asked her about how this made her feel about men in general and seeking a close and strong, permanent bond, These were my words and near to my own love definition.

    She told me that the only love, having lived for 34 years that she had ever seen or known was that from her dog. She pulled up a sleeve on her shirt to show a tattoo of a French pug with the word Daisy underneath.

    To paraphrase Sinead, Nothing compares to the love of a dog.

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Love is a chemical reaction. Chemical reaction is real, therefore, love is real. If love is real then it exists.

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    Senior Member VertOlive's Avatar
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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    I was simply too engaged in life to notice that 48 years had passed solo. Of course, there have been many beloved dogs...

    Then the appointed Soul Mate literally appeared on my porch one morning and that was that. It happens. Or not.

    Meanwhile, dive deep into life!
    "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life"?—Mary Oliver

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by VertOlive View Post
    I was simply too engaged in life to notice that 48 years had passed solo. Of course, there have been many beloved dogs...

    Then the appointed Soul Mate literally appeared on my porch one morning and that was that. It happens. Or not.

    Meanwhile, dive deep into life!
    How did the Soul Mate appear on your porch of all the porches in the world? Will you tell us the story?
    Lady Onogaro

    "Be yourself--everybody else is already taken." --Oscar Wilde

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lady Onogaro View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by VertOlive View Post
    I was simply too engaged in life to notice that 48 years had passed solo. Of course, there have been many beloved dogs...

    Then the appointed Soul Mate literally appeared on my porch one morning and that was that. It happens. Or not.

    Meanwhile, dive deep into life!
    How did the Soul Mate appear on your porch of all the porches in the world? Will you tell us the story?
    Milk or mail delivery, maybe?

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Traditionally a plumber I gather...
    Some days, it's hardly worth chewing through the leather straps....

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Yes it does exist. Finding it though, that's the tricky thing. Sometimes it happens when you least expect it.
    Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

    http://www.etsy.com/shop/peachez


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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    "How did the Soul Mate appear on your porch of all the porches in the world?"

    Nothing glamorous. I had just moved into the condo next door to him. He walked over to offer a pizza while I was moving in...
    "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life"?—Mary Oliver

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    Senior Member KKay's Avatar
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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Spideysgirl how old are you, if you don't mind my asking? I do believe that everyone has at least one chance at love. I was lucky to find true love a couple of times. It usually comes at a time when you least expect it. Don't give up hope, but don't put your life on hold waiting for it either.

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by KKay View Post
    It usually comes at a time when you least expect it. Don't give up hope, but don't put your life on hold waiting for it either.
    This; when you get out of bed/walk out of the house, tell yourself you wont find love and just go and do your thing - you'll be surprised what a lil' reverse psychology can achieve .

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    Default Re: Love. Does it even exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by SIR View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by KKay View Post
    It usually comes at a time when you least expect it. Don't give up hope, but don't put your life on hold waiting for it either.
    This; when you get out of bed/walk out of the house, tell yourself you wont find love and just go and do your thing - you'll be surprised what a lil' reverse psychology can achieve .
    This gives me hope. Not much but some.
    Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

    http://www.etsy.com/shop/peachez


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