I have done this elsewhere but would explain my past actions here

[Titivillus]

For the longest time I was a happy little pen collector trying to learn from others and present my learnings while going through a good number of inks and pens and paper for around 20 some years. But then I sort of had a major thing happen to me being Hurrican Katrina. My house was damaged but not destroyed but the people I worked with about half had their houses and belongings taken out to sea by the storm surge. I went back down 2 weeks after evacuating to find checkpoints with M16 toting military handing out water, ice and Mrs as there were no stores open. The bridge to the city looked like domino's knocked around and I had to drive by and around a dozen or so coffins then a fishing boat sticking out of a house. This went on for weeks as my office e had a 3 foot mud line that needed to be cleaned and bleached before using it. I know a half dozen people that waited out the storm and ended up in refrigerated trailers waiting for next of kin to identify the body.
I thought that I was handling it well but I fact not really, my one lifeline to a normal life was a pen collecting website but my mind was in shock still so I was taking comments and posts in what I thought was a reasonable way but was in fact a hair trigger. So the powers there stripped me of my authority which drove me deeper into depression and then a particular member who became a power there made it their goal to bait me to the point I was banned (this person was also removed later). But it did not help me. My family pushed me to get help for this as suicidal thoughts are nothing to play with.

After 5 years I hope I can say that If not cured I am able to work through it one day at a time.

So to anyone that I was mean to or maybe was excessive In my postings please forgive me, the best I can say was that I was not in my right mind and do regret my past actions. There is nothing I can do to fix what has happened but continue o my path to be a better person. I had wished that the other site had had some compassion and talked to me rather than a Friday evening PM saying I was done. I can only hope that other people treat them better than they dealt with me.

K

[pengeezer]

Having started as a member in the other pen community back in `08,I remember the issues that were
going on and how they handled them then--like they do now,but with more enforcement today. Topics that "could" start flame wars
gradually died away or were taken away in the guise of "maintenance". The hand is heavier there now.
I was never hurt by anything that you said there;rather I found you to be someone that I could carry
on an intelligent conversation with.


John

[VertOlive]

No worries, my friend. I have always enjoyed your posts and often wished we'd hear more from you.

[spotted and speckled]

You are loved and accepted. No worries! Your words were always appreciated.

[Manny]

Welcome back to life.

[Frank]

It's good to see you here Kurt!

[Pendragon]

I thought that I was handling it well but I fact not really, my one lifeline to a normal life was a pen collecting website but my mind was in shock still so I was taking comments and posts in what I thought was a reasonable way but was in fact a hair trigger.

You could have fooled me. I never realized that you had been through such a traumatic event. You were one of the better things about that pen collecting website, and one of the most positive and beneficial presences there. You stood up for the little guys at a time when others in power were stepping on them. Your posts and commentary seemed entirely reasonable to me, and not at all hair trigger responses. Of course, that is in my humble opinion, but I think many others felt the same way.

I am glad you are here!

So the powers there stripped me of my authority which drove me deeper into depression and then a particular member who became a power there made it their goal to bait me to the point I was banned (this person was also removed later).

Their banning you sure seemed to piss off a lot of people. That course of action was quite counterproductive and unnecessary.

Again, it is good to see you here. It is a fine place to be!

[Sailor Kenshin]

T, I never went through anything like that, but I know that after Sandy I was not myself. It took months to get back to 'normal' and I'm not there yet.

People may forget what going through stuff does to people.

[Plume145]

People may forget what going through stuff does to people.

Truer words, and all. Going through stuff means you never 'go back' to normal, you just create a new normal. It's very much a re-invention.

Titivilus, I don't know what happened on the Other Place, it sounds like it was before my time, but I'm still SO sorry for what you went through. That poor area of the world has been kicked again and again, Katrina in '05, then that oil spill in '10 affecting some of the same area...what a living nightmare

[HughC]

You'll enjoy it here, it's open , friendly and well run. If you decide to do any more over at the FPB I'll certainly look forward to it, I'm sure the past can be left where it belongs.

All the best for the future,
Hugh

[picautomaton]

I noted your sudden disappearance, good to have you back.

Any idea what might have happened to member Zeiss Ikon?

[Jon Szanto]

What is past is past. I hope you have a bright future, and certainly hope you enjoy your time here on FPG and become involved. People with good hearts like yourself are what makes a community strong.

Welcome.

[Crazyorange]

Welcome. My good friend lived through Katrina and then sandy. It was extremely hard for her and family. You have my wishes for a continued path of healing.

[Wolverine1]

Kurt- it is great that you have overcome your demons and are back again participating on this and other pen forums!!!! I rememberyou well from your many posts on Pentrace and then on FPN. I wondered where you were, and now, it is great toosee you active again.
BTW, how old is your baby boy now? I remember how happy you were when he was born, and the pictures you had posted.
Welcome back, my friend!!!!

[gregamckinney]

Glad to see you back in penville.
I can relate to the difficulty of the struggles with mental issues, and congratulate you for having the strength to move forward.
Best Regards, greg